How to have a bath

If you have children it can be difficult to get half an hour of alone time. Having a bath is a great way of relaxing, enjoying some quiet time and having a good wash. Here are my top tips for having a bath during half term.

How NOT to have a bath

Picture the scene, it’s half term, you have a lively three year old and two small dogs, you fancy a quick bath, because you’re worth it.

1. Run the bath, add your favourite bath oil or bubble bath, create a relaxing bathing ambience.
2. Put the TV on in the bedroom, supply the small boy with juice and a snack, all seems well so leave them to it.
3. Get into bath and allow the warm water to lap over you, breathe in the aromas from your expensive bath oil, relax.
4. Realise that you’ve forgotten to shut the door.
5. Moments later the small boy and two small dogs wander in. Chaos ensues.
6. Forget how to relax as the small boy bellows “CAN I HELP WASH YOUR BOOBS PLEASE”. Die a little inside as you explain that your boobs don’t need cleaning.
7. Repeat the phrase “no you can’t get in the bath with me” seven times before he just climbs in the bath with you. Die a little more inside.
8. Give up trying to shave your legs and resign yourself to being half smooth goddess and half yeti.
9. Give up on your half an hour of me time. Get out and leave the small boy to enjoy your delicious bath with expensive bath oils.
10. Finish washing your hair in the sink. Voila!

How to have a bath

1. Run the bath, add your favourite bath oil or bubble bath, create a relaxing bathing ambience.
2. Put the TV on in the bedroom, supply the small boy with juice and a snack, all seems well so leave them to it.
3. Firmly shut the bathroom door, locking it if possible.
4. Get into bath and allow the warm water to lap over you, breathe in the aromas from your expensive bath oil, relax.
5. Emerge from the bath scrubbed, shaved, invigorated and beautiful.

Guess which kind of bath I’ve just had.

How to have a bath

15 responses to “How to have a bath

  1. MENTALLY ME (@stuckinscared)

    Am I allowed to laugh ;o)

  2. Haha that’s so funny! I get in the bath every evening while Paul does the stories. I do try and firmly shut the door, even wedging a towel in it at times. However, the pitter patter of little feet inevitably materialises down the landing and practically headbutts the door open. Cue “MUMMY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” and “MUMMY, CAN I JUST WASH YOUR HAIR?”

  3. hahaha! My 7 year old tortures me when I go in the bath….Even if I shut the door she stands at it knocking and asking to come in….lol

  4. Brilliant timing. Yesterday I actually said “it’ll be much easier to have a nice relaxing bath when Iris is a bit older” and you’ve just burst my bubble! Made me really laugh though, thank you!

  5. Haha this is so me. I always forget to close the door and my 2 year old will climb in dressed or not. Then you can forget having a bath as all the water ends up on the bathroom floor rather than in the tub.

  6. Ah yes, the boob cleaning and half shaven pits, marvellous creatures these children! A brilliantly good humoured post!

  7. Lol. I’m glad I take showers!

  8. I did laugh out loud at the half goddess half yeti part! Brilliant #BritMumsCarnival

  9. I’m glad the dogs didn’t get in too! I have a shower first thing in the morning before the kids are up, it’s the only way to get some peace in our bathroom!

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