I get a bit teary sometimes when people ask me when I’m going to have my next child and I have to tell them I can’t have any more children. The loss of what might’ve been I feel acutely, but I know I am bloody lucky to have what I’ve got.
I creep into his room most nights to look at him, partly because he’s still for once and I can get a good look at him, partly because he looks so damn cute when he sleeps, and partly because I think it does me good to fill my heart full of love before I go to sleep at night. So with that in mind, here are 12 of the things I love about my son…
- I love the sound of my son yawning when he’s having his dream wee.
- I love the way he sleepily snuggles onto his dad’s shoulder when he’s carried back to bed, like the little boy he is and not the big boy he thinks he is.
- I love the way he wakes me up “like a princess”, which is to kiss me like Sleeping Beauty might be kissed by her handsome prince.
- I love the way he climbs into bed with me for ten minutes of putting stickers in his farm book before he goes to school.
- I love the way he shares things with us, breaking off a small piece of his toast for us and sharing every bag of sweets he gets.
- I love the way he stands with his hands on his hips, surveying the street like a tiny foreman, pointing out anything of interest “look mummy, a rubbish lorry”.
- I love his sleeping face, peaceful and angelic, still with the soft round cheeks of a small boy, framed by his long eyelashes a thousand girls will later envy.
- I love the way he slips his hand into mine when we walk together, his is so warm and soft and he doesn’t mind me squeezing it as I try to burn the memory of his little hand into my mind.
- I love the way he loves music, asks for it to be turned up and rocks out whenever he has the chance.
- I love reading with him, baking, making crafts and drawing. I love talking about our days and about all of the things in our lives.
- I love how polite he is in company, how he will behave impeccably in a restaurant, how people say he’s a credit to us.
- I love learning about him. He’s good at counting, less good with phonetics, loves sport and is a bit obsessed with robots.
I love him. With all of my heart.
Of course there are things I don’t love. The rough play, the tantrums, the frankly gross habits I know I’ll be moaning about for the rest of my life. But I’m the mother of a boy, a beautiful, lively, intelligent, caring boy. And I wouldn’t swap him for the world.