Just 365 Days until I’m 40

Today is my 39th birthday. When people ask me how old I am they do the head tilt and I’m sorry for your loss face, like my birthday is akin to a death in the family and that time is mercilessly marching on. That’s what time does, it inevitably drags you each second, each minute slightly closer to old age and infirmity.

Except I already feel reasonably infirm. I know pensioners who don’t groan with pain when they stand up half as much as I do, so I’m cool with the getting old thing, because my body is already like 75 or something.

I have 365 days left until I’m 40. I’m curious as to what the big deal is, when that magical day arrives does a fanfare sound and your boobs suddenly drop to your knees, your hair turns white and you start paying into your funeral plan? Well I’ve got news for you time, you’re too late on at least two of those things!

I’m pretty sure nothing actually happens and that 40 is nothing special any more. Thirty years ago 40 was properly old, with life expectancy considerably lower than it is now, turning 40 mean’t you probably had 25 years left, tops. These days barring serious illness or disaster, people are living well into the eighties or nineties. So chances are I’ll be creaking on for a little while yet. 

Last year on my 38th birthday I reflected on the previous 12 months and nothing had really changed. The year before that I did the same, and nothing had changed. And the year before that, and the year before that. Nothing really changed. Ok, so I’ve had to change my job because of my health, and I’ve changed my entire life when I became a mum, but time ticks on and nothing ever really changes.

I don’t fear 40, because it will be no different to 39 and 39 will pretty much be the same as 38. A friend asked me how old I’d be today, I told her I was 39, “howay pet (she’s from the extreme North), you donae look that old” and that is the hope I’m hanging on to. 

I’m not especially vain, I’ve never been a beauty so it’s not like I have looks to lose. I’ve always been the funny one who gets drunk and makes people laugh. I’ve always been the caring one who people tell their darkest secrets to, or come to for a shoulder to cry on. These things don’t tend to age, they don’t tend to droop or go grey or get wrinkles. Plus I’ve got my Nan’s “good skin” and my Dad’s don’t give a crap attitude.

So with 365 days left until I’m 40 I can honestly say I don’t give a crap. Happy birthday me; may 39 be a vintage year, full of gin and tonics, pedicures and curly wurlys. Chin chin x

nearly 40

Balance Transfer Your Life with MoneySupermarket

My family is probably fairly typical, we’re always busy-busy, always on the go, juggling work and family responsibilities. Don’t get me wrong, we have a lot of fun, but sometimes some mundane tasks get forgotten about, or put on the back burner until someone can be bothered to sort it. I often fantasise about having my own PA to deal with all the really boring stuff like bills and paperwork, giving us more time to make cakes and go for walks by the river and so forth.

Somewhere a fairy was listening and waved her magic wand, MoneySupermarket got in touch to tell me about their “Balance Transfer Your Life” scheme (or #BTYL if you’re on Twitter). Balance Transfer Your Life is a really, really cute competition, you just tweet them your neglected job, for example, painting the bathroom, new clutch for the car or maybe a trip to see Granny in Wales, whatever you’ve been meaning to do but couldn’t either find the time, motivation or money to do, tweet them and they’ll pick ten of the best and make those dreams come true.

For our part, we chose to treat our son on his birthday. The big day was fast approaching but we’d not managed to arrange anything special, nor did we have many spare pennies to splash out on the kind of treat he deserved. Very kindly, the MoneySupermarket fairy arranged for us to go out for a fabulous meal on his birthday, complete with a brilliant cake, balloons, singing and ice cream.

We had a slap up meal in Zizzi in Didsbury, Manchester. The staff couldn’t have been more welcoming and lovely with us. Our meal was delicious, my Ravioli Di Capra was among the best I’ve had and Hubs had a Calzone which he happily polished off and said he’d definitely have again (praise indeed from my man of few words).

The small boy had a build your own pizza which looked really tasty, we’re fans of a thin base with extra cheese and he got exactly that. Then they brought out the huge chocolate lion birthday cake, the small boy loved the fuss and the cake (who doesn’t like chocolate cake?). We  had a thoroughly memorable family meal and a proper birthday treat.

balance transfer your life

Moneysupermarket started the ‘Balance Transfer Your Life’ competition because they knew that some people end up paying high interest rates on their credit card debts. Although there are offers available which let you transfer your outstanding balance to a zero per cent balance transfer card, leaving you interest free on your debt until the deal expires, it’s something which is easy to put off. Despite being a big money saver, the process of sorting it is one of those little tasks that people put on the back burner.

Things like finding a credit card with a free balance transfer, there are loads of these little niggling tasks that we just keep putting off, which is why MoneySupermarket is getting involved and offering you the chance to ‘balance transfer your life’ – no matter what the little chore is.

You can find out more about this great (and really easy) competition from MoneySupermarket on their website.

balance transfer your life

How to make a really easy Train Birthday Cake

Children’s birthday parties can be fairly hard work, with lots to remember, from party food, party bags, games, music, costumes and cake. I’m all for making life easy (and on a budget), so this year instead of buying an expensive cake we opted to make our own. The small boy wanted a train birthday cake to go with his train birthday party and who am I to argue?

Train birthday cake

To make this easy train birthday cake you will need:
Three rounds of sponge cake (as described below)
Half a jar of raspberry jam (approx), or strawberry if you prefer
Two tubs of Betty Crocker Vanilla Buttercream icing
Three tubes of smarties
Bigjigs trains (see below)
One cake board (or big enough plate)

Hubs is the baker of the household, so I asked him to make three layers of sponge cake. Use your favourite and foolproof sponge cake recipe (his used 8 eggs to give you an idea of the amount of sponge we made) you want to make three round sponge cakes baked in a 25cm tin. Once baked they need to be around an inch tall.

Once the cakes are cool, put a blob of the buttercream on the cake board and place the first layer of sponge on top of that, this helps to anchor the cake to the board and stops it sliding about. Spread a layer of jam on top of the first layer. Carefully turn the second layer upside down and gently spread the flat bottom with the buttercream and sandwich in top of the jam layer.

On the top of the second layer, spread evenly with more jam and then spread buttercream on the upturned bottom of the top layer of sponge, put that on top. You should have a three layered cake in front of you which from the bottom goes…
Blob of buttercream
Cake
Jam
Buttercream
Cake
Jam
Buttercream
Cake

With me so far? Good. Now you’ve got all your layers stacked carefully, spread the remaining buttercream over the top and sides of the cake. Don’t worry about it being prefect, if you aim for the rustic look it’ll be fine. I created a wavy effect with a palette knife and the sides were rough but fully covered. If you want you can make the buttercream smooth.

Bigjigs make a sort of pick and mix name train set, I bought mine from my local toy shop Giddy Goat Toys. I bought the carriage and the letters of his name for £2.25 each, which cost me just £9 in total. This was much cheaper than buying a proper train and carriages and much more personal.

I gave them a little wash, though they’d been in a sealed box, then using a little blob of the buttercream “glued” the removable letters onto the carriages and pressed the train into the thick buttercream in the top of the cake.

Tipping the smarties into a bowl I then wrote his age in smarties on the top of the cake, then I used the remaining smarties to edge around the bottom of the cake. I was pretty pleased with my efforts.

If you do this the night before the party and leave it out uncovered overnight, the buttercream should firm up slightly and make it easier to transport. On the morning of the party I wrapped it loosely in foil and it sat in my knee in the car on the way to the party. On arrival we unwrapped it and there were no buttercream smears on the foil and it still looked good. Phew.

The cake tasted really good, but hubs does make beautiful cakes. We had lots of lovely compliments about it. It sliced into approx 24 slices, which was more than enough for a kids party.

Our lovely and quite huge train birthday cake was a really big hit, a few people thought we’d bought it (ha, always a compliment) and the small boy was really, really pleased with it and proudly showed it off to his friends. It’s a really easy way to make a simple sponge birthday cake a little bit special.

Train birthday cake

How to make a really easy train birthday cake

Birthday Girl (38 today)

It’s almost a blogging tradition on your birthday to look back over the previous 12 months and reflect on what has passed. I can’t be bothered, I’ve looked backwards for far too long now, it’s time to look forwards for a change, time to give what’s coming at me the hairy eyeball.

What’s going to happen…
My baby (now aged 3) will start nursery at school
I will get a bit greyer and a bit more wrinkly
My back will deteriorate a bit more
I will start a new, very part time, but very fun job
With school hours and work my lifestyle will change, along with it friendships
We will get a puppy and I’ll pretend it’s the baby I can’t have

What I’d like to happen…
I’d like to be a better Mum
I’d like to earn enough money to feed my family
I’d like to be in less pain
I’d like to laugh more and be loved more
I’d like not to be a slave to my anxiety
I’d like to watch more sunsets, hear the roar of the sea and feel the wind in my hair

I don’t think it’s an outrageous list of demands, especially coming from a girl who put “conditioner” on her birthday list. I just want to be happy, safe and loved. It’s all anyone wants I think. I try so hard to make sure the small boy feels all that, because it’s so important; as adults, as parents those things are often neglected. Or maybe that’s just me.

So happy birthday me, I’m 38, who knew I’d make it this far? Let’s raise a glass and toast surviving another year! Cheers.

Birthday girl

Happy Birthday Baby x

My Dear Benjamin,
Happy Birthday darling, you’re three today and so grown up.

Birthday boy Benjamin
Birthday boy Benjamin

You’re such a cheeky, funny little monkey. Tonight you grabbed my boob and sang “jelly on a plate, jelly on a plate, wibble, wobble, wibble, wobble, jelly on a plate” it was a bit inappropriate but absolutely hilarious.

That’s you all over. You’ve got funny bones. I always say you’re the best bits of me and your Daddy rolled into one gorgeous, perfect little package. You’ve got your Dads calm, you’re clever like him too and can be quite considered; physically you’re almost identical to him, you run and walk the same, everyone says so.

You’re funny and cheeky like me; you’re a quick learner, pretty astute, but mainly just funny and laid back. Oh and your stubbornness, that comes from both of us, we come from a long line of pig-headed sods. Embrace it as the irritating gift it is, it’ll see you through some tough times one day, I’m pretty sure of that.

So, my beautiful Benjamin. You are much admired for your good looks and squishy cheeks. People comment on your gorgeous deep brown eyes with lashes that 98% of girls would kill for. They think you’re laid back and chilled, you’re funny and kind, you really are so kind Benjamin. Never lose that please.

You’ve got just the right amount of confidence. Enough so you can walk into a room and crack on with stuff without clinging to my legs, but not too much that people think you over-confident and precocious.

I think we’ve done a pretty decent job of dragging you up so far. You really are a good, easy going lad and we’re so proud of you. We’ve had a bad year and I’ve not been able to be the Mummy that you needed me to be, I hope that this next year we’ll be able to make up for lost time.

Stick to your guns and just be you, be true to yourself and always do what feels right. If you do that you won’t go far wrong.

Have a brilliant birthday Benj. You really are the best thing that’s ever happened to me and your Daddy. Keep being you.

All our love, forever,

Mummy & Daddy xxx

37 things about me for my 37th birthday

Today is my 37th birthday so I’ve decided to blog my 37 favourite things about my life as well as some nice, positive (for a change) things about me.37 things about me for my 37th birthday

37 things about me for my 37th birthday

  1.  I have found increased confidence in my late 30’s which is empowering.
  2.  I have a wonderful husband (of 13 years).
  3.  I have an amazing, funny and adorable son.
  4.  I have a great collection of brilliant and caring friends.
  5.  I am honest, often brutally so, but you’ll never hear me lie.
  6.  I have a small but supportive family.
  7.  I am actually a pretty good Mum.
  8.  We have a place in Devon where I find ultimate peace and serenity.
  9.  I love to lie on the rocks and listen to the waves crash against them for hours. I love and fear the power of the sea.
  10.  I love a good storm, rumbles of thunder, flashes of lightening, the feeling of ecstatic foreboding is beautiful.
  11.  I’m a good cook, can make delicious meals out of nothing and I enjoy creating in the kitchen.
  12.  I love social media. Twitter has got me through some dark, dark times these past 12 months.
  13.  I love blogging. I’ve always loved writing and having my blog helps me get my thoughts and feelings out of my head.
  14.  Although I hate myself most of the time, I am kinda cute (but never beautiful).
  15.  I love to dance and go about it with gay abandon.
  16.  Music is my life and first love, though my tastes are mainly stuck around 1995.
  17.  I’m reasonably bright and excellent at Trivial Pursuits.
  18.  I am entertaining company especially on nights out.
  19.  I wear my heart on my sleeve and care a great deal about people.
  20.  I am a good listener and happy to lend a shoulder to cry on.
  21.  I am reasonably good at photography.
  22.  I love walking. With my iPod on I can walk for miles lost in my thoughts.
  23.  I am strong.
  24.  I am able to endure considerable physical pain.
  25.  I love Pilates even though it hurts.
  26.  I developed a love of film at uni and especially love Quentin Tarantino films.
  27.  My favourite sport is ice hockey. It is awesome.
  28.  I love Scandinavia and everything Scandinavian.
  29.  My favourite flowers are sweet peas. Their scent lifts my spirits.
  30.  I have an excellent sense of humour and the dirtiest laugh in Manchester (fact).
  31.  I no longer care what people think about me which is empowering.
  32.  I love trying new things and exploring various boundaries in my life.
  33.  I am a chronic underachiever but I’m cool with that now.
  34.  I pretty much always root for the underdog or at the very least I can see things from their perspective.
  35.  I am able to endure and have endured. And have survived.
  36.  The thing I am most proud of is my son.
  37.  I don’t fear being 40.
Happy 37th Birthday to me!