Toy Review: Outdoor fun with Gazillion Bubbles

AD/Gifted. After a drab and dreary start to the year, this week, our first week in coronavirus isolation was full of blue skies and sunshine. It seemed a bit of a shame to spend all day indoors, slaving over worksheets from school, but as a reward for hard work, we spent our afternoon in the garden enjoying the good weather and playing with some Gazillion Bubbles we’d been kindly sent by Tesco.

If you’ve not heard of Gazillion Bubbles before, they’re a range of bubble making toys. We were sent the following products from the range; Gazillion Bubbles Tornado Machine; Gazillion Incredibubble Wand; the Gazillion Megabubble Blaster and the Gazillion Giant Bubble Solution 2L.

Toy Review: Outdoor fun with Gazillion Bubbles

All of the Gazillion Bubbles products were heaps of fun. We started off by setting up the Gazillion Bubbles Tornado Machine (usually £12, currently half price), which needed 4AA batteries (not supplied). It comes with a small bottle of bubble solution and once it’s switched on, it blows out about a gazillion bubbles. This was so much fun and would be really great for parties and get togethers. We cheerfully aimed the bubbles over the fence towards our young neighbours and they enjoyed them too.

Toy Review: Outdoor fun with Gazillion Bubbles

The boy was super keen to get his hands on the Gazillion Megabubble Blaster (usually £10, currently half price); a bubble blowing gun. This needs 3AA batteries (not supplied) and is lovely fun and great for angling over fences to delight other young children. He loved chasing us around and firing bubbles at us and the dog!

My personal favourite was the Gazillion Incredibubble Wand (usually £8, but currently £6). If you’ve ever watched people blow those huge bubbles and wanted to try this for yourself; this is the kit you need. It’s really simple. It’s just a circular reservoir for the bubble solution and a large hoop which you dip in, then waft through the air. It produces the biggest and most beautiful bubbles and we were all fighting to get our hands on it to try it out for ourselves.

Toy Review: Outdoor fun with Gazillion Bubbles

Each of the sets comes with a bottle of bubble solution to get you started. If you’re serious about bubbles; then I suggest you also get the 2 litre bottle of Gazillion Giant Bubble Solution (currently 2 for £10 at Tesco). The Giant Bubble Solution is a giant version of the little bubble pots. It comes with a big wand for you to blow bigger bubbles with. It’s also ideal for topping up the little bottles in your other Gazillion Bubbles sets.

We had so much lovely fun with Gazillion Bubbles. It was lovely to get outside in the sunshine; run about a bit, laugh a lot, be silly and forget our worries. We really like the Gazillion Bubbles sets, and we’re looking forward to more bubble filled sunny days this summer!

Gazillion Bubbles are available from Tesco and Amazon.

Note: We were sent these toys in exchange for this blog post. All images and opinions are our own.

Vegetarian Recipe: Aubergine Bruschetta

AD/Complimentary ingredients. Aubergine is probably one of my favourite vegetables. Admittedly it took me a while to warm to it, if it’s not cooked properly it can be pretty disgusting. These days I am probably cooking with aubergine once a week. My recipe for imam bayildi is a firm family favourite, as well as the delicious dip, ikra, but I’ve also added Aubergine Parmigiana to my repertoire.

If I’m cooking a casual lunch for friends, I like to make a few simple things to go with a big salad. One of my favourite things to make are these tasty aubergine bruschetta. They’re packed full of vegetables, they’re pretty healthy and they always go down a storm.

Vegetarian Recipe: Aubergine Bruschetta

This week I ordered a Local Box from Creamline Diaries. With the Creamline Best of Local Box scheme, you can get brilliant locally produced food from independent producers delivered to your door. The meat is from my local butchers, the bread is from a fantastic local baker and fresh fish from the fishmongers. The fruit and veg are fresh from the market each day and you can even stock up your store cupboard.

Vegetarian Recipe: Aubergine Bruschetta

My Creamline box was brilliant and contained pretty much everything I needed to make this delicious aubergine bruschetta. It’s just the thing if you want to shop local, but don’t really have the time to visit all your local shops, or if you just can’t carry all your shopping home.

Aubergine Bruschetta

Ingredients:

1 large aubergine
1 medium onion, finely diced (I prefer red, but a white onion works too)
2 cloves of garlic
1 pepper, finely diced. It’s traditional to use green, but I used red for colour
Olive oil
12 ripe cherry tomatoes, quartered
Big handful of chopped parsley
Tomato purée, if you think it needs it
1 teaspoon of sugar
Salt & pepper
Ciabatta bread
A ball of mozzarella cheese.

Method:

I find it best to chop all the veg before I start cooking, so finely dice your onion and pepper, quarter your cherry tomatoes and put to one side while you prep the aubergine. Cut the aubergine in half lengthways and finely dice one half. With the other half, slice lengthways it in thick, 1cm slices.

Add a generous glug of olive oil to a deep sided frying pan, add the onions, pepper and aubergine and begin to soften the veg. This should take around half an hour on a low heat, stir occasionally. Add a splash of water to help the veg soften. After you’ve been cooking this for around 15 mins, add your tomatoes, garlic and a generous amount of salt and pepper. It’s cooked when all the veg are soft and the aubergine is melty and isn’t woolly. Once cooked, throw in a handful of chopped parsley and stir.

Vegetarian Recipe: Aubergine Bruschetta

As ever, taste the aubergine and add more seasoning if you think it needs it. I sometimes add a little bit of chilli sauce to add a bit of spice, but that’s up to you.

Meanwhile, take your aubergine slices and put them on a baking tray, add a very generous amount of olive oil and cook in a 200c oven, loosely covered in foil until they are soft and floppy, this will take about half an hour, turn them over about half way through.

To assemble your aubergine bruschetta, toast or griddle thick slices of ciabatta brushed with olive oil, top with your aubergine and veg mix, then artfully decorate with your slices of aubergine, some torn mozzarella and a sprinkle of chopped parsley. You can eat this hot or cold, though I like them still warm, but not piping hot.

For more information about Creamline Dairies, visit their website.

Vegetarian Recipe: Aubergine Bruschetta

Note, we were sent this box in exchange for a blog post mentioning the box scheme.

Cooking with Kids: Quick Herby Flatbreads

When school finished on Friday, my son was sent home with a pack of work to keep him busy while the schools are closed. The pack was full of maths and English worksheets, instructions for projects and lots of serious academic stuff. He’s in Year 4 and the emphasis right now is getting them up to speed for a big times tables test. In amongst the serious stuff was a copy of the curriculum for the rest of the year, tucked away in a dark corner were the words “bread making” so I’ve decided to break up the hardcore academic stuff with a series of bread making sessions, starting with these herby flatbreads.

I think that learning to bake bread is a pretty essential life skill. Where I live I’ve been struggling to find bread in the shops, so we’ve been mostly going without. I reckon being able to knock up some simple bread at home will tide us over. Bread making isn’t just about feeding ourselves, you can learn other lessons too, like maths (measuring out) and science (how yeast makes bread rise, etc).

Cooking with Kids: Quick Herby Flatbreads

Lunchtime was nearly upon us, so bellies rumbling we put together these really simple herby flatbreads. You can make them without the dried herbs if you prefer, but they were so much nicer with them. We ate them with hummus and carrot sticks, but they’d be brilliant with a curry or stew. They’re more snappable than bendy, almost like an Armenian lavash bread than a tortilla. Delicious.

Cooking with Kids: Quick Herby Flatbreads

Quick Herby Flatbreads

Ingredients
200g plain flour
¼ teaspoon of salt
100ml warm water
2 tablespoons of oil, I used vegetable, but olive or sunflower would work too, plus extra for cooking
1 teaspoon of dried mixed herbs
Ground pepper

Method
Put the flour and salt in a mixing bowl, make a well in the middle and trickle in the warm water, mixing as you go. We used a metal knife to mix with, but if you don’t mind getting messy, you can use your (very clean) hands.

Once the flour, salt and water are all mixed together, add the oil, the dried herbs and some black pepper and knead the dough with your hands. If the dough is too sticky, add a some more flour, if it is too dry add a drop more water.

Tip the dough out onto a floured surface and knead the dough for five minutes. Try stretching the doings and folding it back on itself, my son loved punching the dough. You knead the dough to develop the gluten in it, this is what makes the bread springy and nice to eat.

Cooking with Kids: Quick Herby Flatbreads

Divide the dough into six balls, and on a clean, floured surface roll out each ball of dough using a rolling pin. Try and roll them into circles, but don’t worry if they aren’t perfect. They need to be as thin as you can make them; that way they will cook all the way through and be crispy and delicious.

Heat a frying pan, if you have a pastry brush, brush some oil over the pan; if not, dribble a tiny bit of oil in the pan and swirl it around. Once your pan has heated up a little, put your first herby flatbread in the pan. Cook each flatbread for about two minutes on each side, flip it over with a spatula. Ben said it looked like a bit like a pancake.

Cooking with Kids: Quick Herby Flatbreads

Once each side was cooked, we gobbled them up with some hummus. Ben said they tasted like the kind of bread we had with curry. If you wanted, you could try making your own butter to go with your herby flatbreads, it’s easy and lots of fun too!

These quick herby flatbreads are really easy to make with children. They’re quick, tasty and are a good introduction to bread making. We have plans for soda bread, focaccia, a crusty loaf and maybe some brioche. He will be a bread making genius by the time he goes back to school!

Cooking with Kids: Quick Herby Flatbreads

30 Screen-free ways to entertain kids at home

With the prospect of the schools potentially closing for any number of weeks, and the thought of trying to keep my lively son entertained for the duration weighing heavily on my mind, I thought it was a good idea to get a list together of ideas to keep him busy, things which are screen-free and reasonably wholesome.

As tempting as it is to arrange a heap of play-dates and days out to local attractions, that defeats the object. If the schools have closed to help slow the spread of the virus, then it makes sense for us to stay at home for much of that period. My healthy, strapping son would likely be hardly touched by the effects of the virus, but older family members which complex heath needs could be hit very hard.

I’m not wild about him spending hours watching the TV or playing computer games all the time. I won’t ban them completely, but limiting his time in front of a screen is a good thing for us. With the prospect of so many days at home to fill, I’ve made a list of 30 screen-free ways I can fill his days.

30 Screen-free ways to entertain kids at home

30 screen-free ways to entertain kids

1. Baking, learn how to bake bread or cakes.

2. Set a Lego challenge.

3. If they’re in Cubs, Brownies, Beavers or Rainbows, have a look on their website and pick some badges to work towards.

4. Play some board games, or create your own.

5. Crafting, why not make some Easter crafts or something for Mother’s Day?

6. Print off some worksheets and work through them.

7. Find out what topics they are doing in school and do some work around that, we like history subjects like Vikings.

8. Create a cosy reading corner and get a stack of books for them to work through.

9. Put up a tent in the garden and make a camp.

10. Learn to knit, crochet or sew.

11. Paint portraits of the family.

12. Make clay hand prints and paint them, or try these clay faces.

13. Do some junk modelling.

14. Make your own ice cream from scratch.

15. Have a room tidying competition, the tidiest room wins a prize!

16. Make a den in the living room.

17. Create an indoor treasure hunt.

18. Make your own pizzas or these pizza hot dogs.

19. Play shopkeepers, get them to set up a shop and they can learn more about money.

20. Create some sensory fun.

21. Have a disco party and a dance off.

22. Learn to meditate, there are lots of CDs and apps for kids which are great for this.

23. Kick a ball around in the garden, get a swingball set and burn off some energy outside.

24. Do a scavenger hunt in the garden.

25. Write your own story and illustrate it too if you like.

26. Do some STEM activities at home, like jelly bean architecture.

27. Get some seeds and start to grow some vegetables or flowers for the garden.

28. Have an indoor picnic, or one in the garden, get them to help make the food.

29. Learn some life skills, like tying shoelaces.

30. Give the dog a pamper day, bath her and brush her and learn about caring for her.

If all else fails, you can always ask them what they want to do. If you’ve got any great ideas for things to do, please comment below.

30 Screen-free ways to entertain kids at home

Recipe: Courgette Cake with Cinnamon Frosting

Courgettes are one of my favourite vegetables. They might not be very exciting, but they’re great with pasta and vegetable bakes and as I discovered this week, they’re very good in cakes too. Vegetable cakes are nothing new, but this was the first time I’ve baked a courgette cake and it won’t be the last. My courgette cake was light, moist and delicious; delicately spiced and devoured almost immediately by my greedy family.

Recipes: Courgette Cake with Cinnamon Frosting

Despite what you may think, the cake really doesn’t taste like it’s packed with courgettes, it just tastes like good cake. With the frosting it looks really pretty too, and for my money is a great way to sneak a nutrient rich vegetable into an unsuspecting child.

Courgette Cake with Cinnamon Frosting

Ingredients
150ml vegetable oil
200g soft brown sugar
3 medium eggs
1 lemon, finely grated and zested
200g coarsely grated courgette
1 heaped teaspoon of ground cinnamon
250g self-raising flour
1 level teaspoon bicarbonate of soda

For the frosting
50g unsalted butter, softened
85g icing sugar, sifted
pinch ground cinnamon
180g soft cheese

Recipes: Courgette Cake with Cinnamon Frosting

Method
Preheat oven to 180°c or gas mark 4. Grease and line a large loaf tin, I use loaf tin liners which are so much easier. In a large mixing bowl, beat the oil, soft brown sugar, and eggs until smooth. I used my hand mixer, but a wooden spoon works just as well.

Stir in the lemon zest, lemon juice, cinnamon and the grated courgette. Tip in the sifted flour and bicarbonate of soda and fold in gently until it’s all mixed together well. Pour the cake batter into the prepared tin and bake for around one hour until risen and golden. If you’re not sure, insert a skewer into the centre of the cake and if it comes out clean, then it’s cooked.

Leave the cake to cool fully on a wire rack for a few hours. The cake has to be fully cool before you pile the frosting on top, or it’ll melt.

With an electric whisk beat together the unsalted butter, cinnamon and icing sugar until it comes together and is smooth. This will take a little while, so persist with it. It will look unpromising and like breadcrumbs for a while. Once it is smooth, add the cream cheese and beat quickly until it’s soft and smooth. Do not over-beat the frosting, or the cream cheese may split and become runny. Spread over the top of the cake with a palette knife or an offset spatula, it might be mice to sprinkle chopped nuts over the top, or more lemon zest if you like. I just made some decorative ripples, then popped the cake in the fridge for the frosting to firm up.

The courgette cake without frosting would happily keep in a tin for a few days, with the frosting it’ll need to be kept in the fridge, or the cream cheese frosting might go off.

Recipes: Courgette Cake with Cinnamon Frosting

If you love carrot cake, or chocolate beetroot cake, try this easy and delicious courgette cake recipe, you’d never know what was in it!

Recipes: Courgette Cake with Cinnamon Frosting

Days Out: Visiting Jorvik DIG, York

Over half term, the boy and I hot footed it up to York to check out the Jorvik Viking Festival. We went last year and had a tremendous time, but we’d missed a few things and needed to remedy that. Top of our list was a visit to Jorvik DIG. DIG is a hands-on archaeological adventure which gives kids the chance to try their hand at archaeology and discover some of the most exciting artefacts from over 2000 years of York’s history.

Days Out: Visiting Jorvik DIG, York

Jorvik DIG is located in St Saviour’s Church, a former Church of England church which was declared redundant in 1954 and later taken over and transformed into DIG by the York Archaeological Trust. DIG is part of a group of historical attractions in York which include the Jorvik Viking Centre and Barley Hall.

During the Jorvik Viking Festival, there’s such a lot going on in York, and local attractions put on extra events. DIG is no different, during the half term there were extra sessions, including the chance to make your own Viking poo (out of clay; but adding seeds, fish bones, worms and all kinds of grim things).

DIG advise that during weekends and school holidays, it’s best to book ahead. We didn’t do this, but we struck lucky and managed to get a slot later that afternoon; so we retired to a local café for lunch, which suited us just fine.

After lunch we went back to DIG and had a look around the upstairs, which was where the poo making workshop was. There was also a small play area for younger children. Downstairs there’s a hands on museum area where you can learn more about archaeology, how they date artefacts and you can look at some of the things which have been found in and around York. There’s also a replica Viking longboat, which is well worth a look at.

Days Out: Visiting Jorvik DIG, York

The big attraction was the tour, which is hourly. We were led into a room where a very knowledgeable guide talked to us about archaeology and about the kinds of things archaeologists do and look for. The children were then all given a trowel and we were introduced to the DIG Excavation Pits, which they were invited to excavate.

There are four pits; Roman York, Viking York, Medieval York and Victorian York. Each pit is based on excavations that have carried out over the past 30 years in York. Scraping back the sand and soil, you can unearth the remains of walls, pottery, shells and much more. The children get a good amount of time to dig away and see what they can find, and it’s all good fun.

Days Out: Visiting Jorvik DIG, York

Next we were led to a large table with boxes of artefacts; each family was asked to sort a box into categories; bones, shells, antlers, rocks, metal etc. We did fairly well at this, and all the while the guide was talking us through the things to look out for. We were also given a box of bones and asked to try and identify the animal they came from.

The highlight for my boy was poo. The guide passed around small fragments of fossilised Viking poo for us to hold and examine. She also held up a replica of the largest piece of fossilised Viking poo they had found during the excavations. It was impressive, if you’re into that kind of thing.

We were at Jorvik DIG for a good couple of hours. I was glad of it as it was an indoor attraction in the middle of a stormy February day. The boy had a great time and despite being sometimes reticent about joining in with things, he had a good go at everything put in front of him.

If you’re visiting York and taking in the historical sights with children; a visit to DIG is well worth the money. It does lack a café, but it’s only a couple of minutes away from several very good ones. The tickets are priced at £6.50-£7 per person, family tickets are available and your ticket is valid for a year; meaning you can return as often as you want.

For more information on Jorvik DIG, visit their website.

Days Out: Visiting Jorvik DIG, York

We paid for our tickets in full.

40 ideas for things to do for Lent

Each year, during Lent many Christians choose to give things up for 40 days. Lent is traditionally a time of abstinence and many people give up chocolate, or wine, or bread even. Some people choose to take up something, such as doing an act of kindness, or giving a small amount to charity each day.

Over the years, following a feast of pancakes, I have variously given up chocolate, crisps and alcohol. I have done acts of kindness each day. This year I’ve been a bit stumped about what to do. I’m peri-menopausal now so the thought of giving up wine or chocolate for 6 weeks is a step too far for me.

40 things to do for Lent

My life feels too stressful right now to give up anything, or commit to doing something for six whole weeks, but last night I had an idea. Why don’t I just give up something or take up something each week during lent, committing to not eating chocolate for one week is doable, giving to charity daily for one week is affordable. The idea of doing six weeks’ worth of one week mini-Lenten promises is very manageable indeed.

I’ve not fully hammered out my plan for Lent. I’m finicky at the best of times, so I thought if I put a list together of suggestions for myself, then I can pick and choose what I fancy doing from one week to the next. Here are 40 ideas for things to do for Lent.

40 things to do for Lent

1. Give up chocolate

2. Give up crisps

3. Give up alcohol

4. Give to charity each day

5. Give up TV/Netflix

6. Have a digital detox

7. Pray each day

8. Meditate each day

9. Do an act of kindness every day

10. Phone a friend or family member each day

11. No shopping/buying new things

12. Decluttering

13. Read more

14. Volunteer

15. Do a beach clean, or street clean, or a litter pick in a park

16. Find ways to reduce your plastic consumption

17. Use public transport instead of driving

18. Stop buying coffee on the go

19. Donate to your local food bank

20. Give up meat

21. Compliment other people

22. Walk every day

23. Give up swearing

24. Give up takeaways

25. Eat a family dinner at the table each night

26. Give up cake

27. Give up fizzy drinks

28. Give up sugar

29. Give up binge watching

30. Give up negativity

31. Turn lights and appliances off when not in use

32. Give up shopping online

33. Give yourself time for yourself

34. Make a point of doing self-care every day, whatever that looks like

35. Read the Bible, or a spiritual text of your choosing

36. Give up guilt – you’re doing the best you can do

37. Take up contentment – be happy, or happier with what you’ve got already in your life

38. Give up gossip

39. Give up smoking or vaping

40. Give up taking selfies/pictures of your dinner

What are you giving up or taking up for Lent? Please comment below and let me know!

40 things to do for Lent

Review: RNCM Young Explorers – Pictures at an Exhibition

On Sunday, the boy and I had a pair of tickets to go and see Young Explorers – Pictures at an Exhibition at the Royal Northern College of Music (RNCM) in Manchester. Storm Ciara was doing her worst, but we braved the tempests and we were very glad we did.

RNCM Young Explorers is a series of concerts designed to introduce young people to music. They’re generally relaxed performances and no one minds if babies cry or children giggle. It’s a great, unstuffy way to get the kids into classical music. We’ve been to similar things before and my boy has always enjoyed them, so I had a feeling he would like this too.

Review: RNCM Young Explorers - Pictures at an Exhibition

Pictures at an Exhibition is a piece of music by Russian 19th Century composer, Modest Mussorgsky. He wrote it in honour of his friend, the artist Vikto Hartman. The music is written so you can imagine you are walking around an art gallery, looking at all of the beautiful painting in it.

Pictures at an Exhibition was a little bit extra special because not only did it feature the Piccadilly Symphony Orchestra, but artist and author James Mayhew was painting scenes from the music live on stage.

We arrived early, had our RNCM Young Explorers Passport stamped (you get a free family ticket when you have 6 stamps) and took our seats. We had a great view of the stage and the easel where James would be painting. There was also a big screen which had the painting projected onto it, so you could watch every brushstroke in huge detail.

Conductor, Tom Newall introduced the orchestra and got a few children in the audience on stage to help him conduct. It set the tone for the afternoon very nicely; friendly, hands on, lots of fun and with a few giggles. Tom introduced the orchestra and then welcomed James on stage.

Review: RNCM Young Explorers - Pictures at an Exhibition

The performance began and James deftly threw some paint on a board and created the most incredible, beautiful paintings. Half way through the first painting, my 9 year old son turned to me and whispered “this is really incredible”. I knew then when we got home I’d be needing to get the paints out for him.

The music was beautiful and provided the perfect backdrop to the painting. The whole audience was entranced by James and during the hour long performance he produced 10 beautiful paintings. It was over all too soon; but in keeping with the hands-on vibe of the day, the orchestra invited the audience to come and have a closer look at the instruments and learn a bit more.

James was thronged with people, we had brought along one of his books to sign so we hung back a little. James very kindly gave us one of his practice paintings and chatted with my boy a bit. He was thrilled and that night went to bed clutching his signed book.

The RNCM Young Explorers series is aimed at children aged 3+. but younger ones are welcome too. My 9 year old was transfixed by the whole thing and I would absolutely take him back to another performance. I think it’s fed his imagination and sparked a few creative thoughts in his (currently Minecraft obsessed) head. I loved it and will be keeping my eyes peeled for similar performances in the future.

Tickets cost from £6 and you can find details of future concerts here.

Frugal Food: Cheesy Leek Gratin

The start of the year is always the longest, leanest time for me. There have been many evenings lately that I have peered into the fridge and wondered what I could cobble together for tea.

A few days ago I picked up some leeks from the greengrocers for not many pence, and being leek fans, I decided to throw together a lovely, comforting cheese leek gratin. It’s remarkably simple and fairly frugal vegetable dish and even my fussy about veg 9 year old asked for seconds!

Frugal Food: Cheesy Leek Gratin

Cheesy Leek Gratin

Sliced leeks, I used six, but you can use more if you want
A little butter for frying
50g butter or margarine
50g plain flour, or sauce flour if you have it
1 pint of milk (maybe a little more, maybe a little less)
100g mature cheddar cheese
30g Parmesan cheese
Salt, pepper and dried chilli flakes
Breadcrumbs

Method
Slice your leeks and fry gently in a bit of butter until they are soft.

Whilst your leeks are softening, melt the butter in a saucepan, once melted, tip in the flour and mix well with a wooden spoon. Mix until it’s a paste and then cook the flour out for a minute. Add a splash of milk and stir until it turns into a paste again. Keep adding milk in splashes and mixing until it starts to turn into a silky sauce. The amount of milk will vary, but I’d say you need at least a pint of milk. If it looks lumpy and unpromising, just use a whisk until it turns into a lovely smooth sauce.

Grate your cheese and add it to your sauce. Set aside about 30g of the cheese to top your bake with. Stir, stir, stir your sauce and season with salt and pepper. I also like to add ground chilli flakes for a bit of a gentle kick, but you can leave that out if you prefer. Taste the sauce to check the seasoning; if it’s not cheesy enough for you, now is a good time to add more cheese. Now is also a good time to pre-heat your oven to 220°.

Once your leeks are soft and your sauce is cheesy and smooth, tip them both into an ovenproof dish and mix together. Smooth the top with the back of a spoon and sprinkle over your reserved cheese. I usually top bakes and gratins with breadcrumbs. It gives a lovely texture and makes it look extra tasty. If I can be bothered I something whizz up some stale bread in the food processor and use that, but I have a tub of ready made breadcrumbs in the cupboard because sometimes life it too short to make your own. I sprinkle whatever I have over the top, use as much or as little as you want.

Frugal Food: Cheesy Leek Gratin

Put your cheesy leek gratin in the oven and bake for 30 minutes until the top is brown and the sauce is bubbling beneath. I’ve made this several times now and it’s a regular veg dish as part of a winter roast. It’s great with chicken or sausages, or even on its own with a crusty piece of bread.

If you enjoyed this, you might like my recipe for slow cooker vegetable stew.

Frugal Food: Cheesy Leek Gratin

Mental Health: Bracing myself for 2020

One of the great things about therapy is that I’ve really started to get to know myself. Whenever I have a wobble these days, I can usually trace it back to something problematic from deep within my psyche. This is hugely helpful, for so many years now I’ve just been bouncing from one source of anxiety to the next; like a nervy little ball in a pinball machine. I’m better now, but not completely.

Since the year turned from 2019 to 2020, a whole heap of anxiety has dumped itself at my feet. 2019 was a year of quite radical change for me and 2020 should see all the seeds of the new life I planted last year grow into something different and hopefully something beautiful this year.

With a couple of weeks until my next therapy session, it’s up to me to try and unpick what all of my current anxiety is about all by myself. This is probably not a bad thing, therapy is partly about giving me the tools to stand on my own two feet and to be able to understand what’s going on with me better.

Unsurprisingly, my current levels of anxiety are all about change; my ability to manage myself over the next year and all that it will throw at me. I’ve got to get things right this year and I’m pretty terrified of cocking everything up and leaving a heap of angry and upset people in my wake.

One of the things therapy has taught me is that I am not responsible for other people’s issues.

I’ll say that again. I am not responsible for other people’s issues.

In the past I would merrily take on other people’s anxiety, anger, criticism of me, whatever and let that negativity sit on me and with me. I would take everything personally, even now I ache inside when I feel like I’ve not met expectations, let someone down or annoyed them. There’s a very damaged part of me who is so eager to please, but knows deep down whatever I do it will not be good enough. I will never be good enough.

It doesn’t take much for me to feel this way. Right now I feel like this. In the past the way to stop the anxiety spiral was to do something destructive or harmful to myself. That urge hasn’t gone and I’m not sure it ever will, but I am better at distracting myself from that path.

When I feel that I’m not good enough, I need to know that I am, and that is one of the things I am working on right now. It would be nice to hear it from other people though. You ARE good at your job. You ARE a great mum. You ARE a good friend. You ARE good enough. You CAN do this. Even typing this emboldens me. I am good enough, and I can do all of the things I need to do. I really, really am good enough.

Learning how to be an emotionally well adult is something which takes place during childhood and there’s a whole chunk of learning I’ve missed out on. I’ll get there though, with the help of my therapist and the people around me who love and care for me.

It will all be ok